Depression Dementia Dad

[Former-Member]

Oh, i walk one dog at a time. If i can go twice a day that will work. Or alt days. My Rt ankle & k ee is quite sore after slipping on the steps into my bedroom this morning. Not sure if imagining it but i feel jarred (achy) all over from slipping on step. The Rt Ankle especially is sore

But could still go for my walk.
Hey, under my skin all over has been tingling since the walk. Think that's a good thing - thats where the fat cells / lipodema is worst.

[Former-Member]

Reeeeeealy flat today, if i'm not moving i feel numb / lifeless so tired. Just heard dad potter in & out of the toot - to tired to go check he's cleaned up ok. I'm worried blackdog might win again. Having urges to run away yet feel trapped.

Couldn't face ppl & go to Church today. Stayed home.

Bro2 rang dad (dad can answer now i found a better phone), bro was good with him though he made a point of telling dad to get out of the house, go outside... (bro2 knows its a hazard for dad to walk around outside without supervision re uneaven ground, balance and mobility issues grr)

I hope i dont fall into despaire, trying to buffer the sibling crap,  it hurts though,  being left out,  being ganged up on.  Ignoring it is probably the best strategy as tryi g to talk seems to only fuel their bazaar agenda. What did i ever do wrong to them?  

I'm 60 in 2wks

Yes, guess it is a good thing i do for dad. I'm not sure he cognitively values what i givej- or just expects it...  But i am pleased with myself i guess,  that i could have this time with him & lesson the darkness in his Valley of the shadow of Death.  At lradt he's acknowledhing me as his daughter more often.  

[Faith-and-Hope]

Hi @Adge ......

You will often find @Former-Member here .....,

👋

[Adge]

Oh Thank you @Faith-and-Hope I did not know that this is where @Former-Member writes.

There are so many (bazillions) of threads & topics - that I often don't find them & don't know that they exist.

Until someone tags me in, of course...

Adge

[Former-Member]

@Former-Member .... putting one foot in front of the other is a hard slog at times. Sending gentle thoughts your way.

[Former-Member]

Welcome @Adge, if you tap a contributer's name, when its blue,  it's a link to the threads theyre active on. Mum's birds are calling for their arvo feed.  Wild birds - doces & rainbow lorekeets. I think of you with the birds.
Lost my emoji app Adge 😞
Sounds like you have similar dramas with family as i'm going through. But don't think I've known anyone who'se made false Elder Abuse allegations.  I dont understand my earth siblings - gonna have to cut them loose - Not family, never were as adults i don't believe.

"You'll know them by their friuit!"

Had a church friend pop in this arvo. Looking after me - had a good talk, blurted things out & prayed with her. Lovely lady - lovely little church, better than any of the the ones back home. This main stream church looks after each other.

"they'll know you are Christians by your love"

[Former-Member]

mohill said"
"Hello @Former-Member, I feel so sad for you... I read about your current situation and cannot believe what you are going through.. Your unwell brothers ... was very hard to read... your sister well I am just speechless... Your dad defending you would have been good for you to hear... Sending you loving thoughts For calmer times ahead... Your dad will be feeling such deep love and respect... so proud that he has you as a daughter... Take care dearest lapses.

[Adge]

I never thought of looking that up @Former-Member Thanks for reminding me.

It sounds so rough what you're going through.

Siblings can be so nasty, I just don't understand why (or how).

I have little contact with my brothers, which makes me very sad.

I have not spoken to the brother who used to be closest to me, in over 12 months.

He never makes the effort, & I don't have the energy (or will) to keep on contacting him - when it's never reciprocated (he doesn't seem to care).

I'm the oldest of 5.

I'm still thinking of you lapses, even though I don't write or say much.

Adge

[Appleblossom]

Just saying hello @Former-Member

love your little touches of wry humour re your mum & dad.

Yeah sisters irl can be a disappointment.

Be prepared to self protect like F&H suggests.

glad you have had company on this thread.

Take care 

[Former-Member]

Not sure on the HOW to self protect. Im normally an open book & get blindsided every time. But i am working on this, somehow...