Self-care - Why can it be so hard?

[Former-Member]

@TBH 

This discussion thread might help you.

[Former-Member]

Tuning in to what I actually need is a "work in progress".... Agreed @Adge. I have read that actually asking yourself that question in a given moment can help, i.e. "what do I need right now?" and I've been working with that. 

@Former-Member thanks for your words on guilt and boundaries ❤️️ It's great to reflect on what the limits are on what we are responsible for in the external world and in other people. I know personally that helps me with feelings of anxiety. 

[Former-Member]

@Former-Member 

I know I am definitely a "work in progress" but am so grateful that I have been able to cope a lot better in recent times.

[Posie1]

Hi fellow forumites! hope youre all keeping well and hope you enjoyed the sunshine today :)I didnt do alot had a self care day ie switched off all social media (less time) as i fing its a big trigger for my self negative talk and i spiral. my anxiety and depression generally flares up . it really helped. also didnt have expectations and pat myself on the back for the tiny weeny little things i did, even just to get up take my meds,mediation and rest all day. im alone alot so cold winter nights are tricky,watch comedy etc or get online. Any other ideas or tips? Thanks, Posie.. :))

[Former-Member]

Hi @Posie1 

Without knowing your hobbies/ interests here are a few suggestions - if you let us know the type of things you are interested in, we might be able to come up with some better creative ideas for you.

1. Craft work- knitting/ crochet/ painting/ sewing either for yourself or to donate/ sell

2. Doing a free on line course 

3. Jigsaws or other off line puzzles

4. Is there a bit of tidying or sorting that would make your living area a bit nicer?

5. Do a mini work out or dance routine (DVD or YouTube).

6. Cook a pot of soup/ casserole/ curry etc and freeze in meal size portions.

7. Do some home baking - muffins, biscuits etc and again freeze in single serve portions.

[Adge]

Your Self-Care list is so good @Former-Member That I shall add it to my Self-Care Toolbox (& try to remember those).

Hi @Posie1

Adge

[Posie1]

Thanks Adge!! Yes they work really well. its always nice to have more tools in your self care kit. what sre some things you like to do to keep happy and peaceful?

[Posie1]

Hi Darcy wow they are great ideas! i love doing things that make you feel a sense of achievement, and to keep you happy and peaceful. im usually into fitness but taking a break so yoga for now and mediatation. hbu?

[Former-Member]

@Posie1 

Have a few things I enjoy doing, but on cold winter nights if I don't have a knitting project on the go, washing to put away or have batch cooking to do the bed is my favourite spot complete with K9 hot water bottles (two whippet dogs).  Evenings are generally my relax time.

Sometimes I phone/ send texts/ emails to encourage family and friends. There is the forum too. There are areas of interest on the internet/ YouTube too, at present this includes frugal  living/ budgeting tips as we are trying to keep to save a little (we have renovations pending). 

I like to keep up to date with mental health information too so that if needed I am ready and able to advocate for Mr Darcy. I try and make sure I have a good understanding of any other medical issues that affect us too. 

If I have had a busy day an early night is  also very appealing.

A quick forum tip, by using the @ symbol you can 'tag' someone like @Adge , this generates a notification so they know you have responded as you have to Adge in the previous posts.

[Adge]

Well it's a Work in Progress @Posie1 As many things in my Self-Care Toolbox (that work for some people), don't work for me.

1) Daily meditations - focusing on my Breathing (in & out), & Being Mindful of Body Sensations (whilst breathing). eg "My toes are tingling"...

2) Weekly & twice weekly Yoga Classes (for the past 9 years) - Very Helpful.

3) Music Videos (when totally unmotivated) - especially with a dance routine (in video).

Watching body movement & dance keeps my focus much better - & I find more motivating, than just listening to music (which I don't do often anyway).

Sometimes I even dance a bit to the music video - which gets my body moving.

Adge