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Quinny
New Contributor

Quinny

I have been married for 30 years with 3 children..and a grandson.. we recently found out my husband has been cheating  for 6 months with a woman 15 years younger . He  shows no remorse and no intention of coming back .. We are a prominent family in a small town .. most of our friends either work with him or drink with him .. this means his social circle hasn't changed while mine is now almost non existent .. Our friends have been very quick to accept this new woman as many of the men have done the same thing in recent years ...  A lot of money , a lot of ego and no rules for those in the " boys club " For some reason I thought we were different .. I never saw this coming .. we are in our 60s and I was looking to retire to what I thought we be a comfortable family chapter with some travel opportunities enjoyed together .. I am feeling betrayed , humiliated but ultimately lost and alone as .reality sets in . He is the love of my life and I admired and trustedhim , and thought it was mutual .. my children have been amazing but ultimately they have their own busy lives ... I feel so lost ...

2 REPLIES 2
jem80
Community Guide

Re: Quinny

@Quinny 

 

Welcome to the forums, you will find many that will support you.


My heart goes out to you. I can understand your feeling of betrayal and I hear you.

 

Its ok to feel lost after what was a stable and trusting relationship. It will take time to heal.

 

Slowly start to focus on some of the things you would like to do once we ease on COVID-19 restrictions. You might want to join some online community groups or clubs where you can meet other people over zoom. Focus on your interests.

 

Try to do things that make you happy and fulfilled in life rather than focus on trying to please others or focus on the boys club. Try to make new friends.

 

It can be difficult for many others when they are friends of both parties, they feel conflicted about who to support and tend to sway towards one party or the other in that broken down relationship.

Re: Quinny

Welcome, @Quinny , it's good that you've joined, where you can find people to support you in what you're going through. 

 

I'm sorry to read about your husband's betrayal, and how lost you're feeling. I can only offer my sympathy. I have had to rebuild my life (for different reasons than yours), and it can be done, with new friends made and new interests, etc. But the breakdown of the old life is very painful and brutal. 

 

I hope you find the forums supportive. A handy forum tip is if you type @ and then click on a member's name in the drop-down box, they will receive a notification that you're replying to them. 

 

All the best, @Quinny ...

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