Therapy on Tuesday. Nerves are setting in. I've had eight therapists in my lifetime. Only two were good therapists, the one I am seeing and the previous one which left due to a new job. The rest were hopeless a couple of them were unprofessional and unethical. The one I have now, he's getting past my barriers. When I first went to see him and we agreed to work together, I jokingly said that I felt sorry for him, "poor bastard, you don't know what you've signed up to"...my actual words. I was cocky cause I'd done this all before; I was too tough, too smart, too damaged...no one was going to make me feel or cry. I was freaking wrong, the sob has gotten to me over and over the last few weeks. I don't like this anymore, it's not funny anymore, I am scared. I want to end therapy but I can't quit, I know it's important, even vital, but I just want it to all go away. I wish I could just hand him the broken bits and he could fix them and give the new improved bits back to me when he's done fixing them. Ok, I am being childish, I know. End of rant.
