DID, it's not confirmed, but have CPTSD

[Just]

@Cali_Rose
Hi, I'm not sure if I'm sending this correctly. I guess if I get a reply all good. Thanks for contacting me. I'm thinking I might have written to U before. But I can't be sure. Do you get a lot of headaches? I do. Just wasn't sure if this is normal for CPTSD. My doctor doesn't think I have DID. So it's just me. Thanks for reading ,@just

[Just]

@Princess lettuce

[Just]

@jynx @BaggyJeans @Shaz @Cali_Rose DID, it's not confirmed, but have CPTSD  DID, it's not confirmed, but have CPTSD 

[Just]

Ok, got a bit lost again trying to find the right place to write this. Best night sleep. I'm feeling I've come to the cross road and the road I m heading down is very bright. I've been just sitting with my thoughts. 

I'm going to continue with that as it's helped me. That and mindfulness. ( Birdwatching) .I be been more connected to my mum and grandmothers who both passed awhile ago. I truely feel free. Funny because I was only thinking last night I have a choose. I can keep working on me. Just me or take who I am to the grave and just spend time partly shut down until then. I'm feeling stronger now. Thanks to all who have shared on "sane" . 

I have received courage and acceptance here. On acceptance, Im accepting my past, this is a ongoing process. But a big choose for me. I'm going to pick at bits until I understand more of me. (Us).? This is all I can write now. ( Going AWOL) for a while. To collect myself in thought. Happy 😭 tears. @Shaz @lavenderhaze @owlunar2 @Jynx 

[Just]

If you want to know who you are. Go back to the start ,,@snowie @Blackbird @Just

[Just]

How am I, at the start?

[Just]

Thanks, will go visit the past now.

[Just]

Ok, going round in circles. Did not know you can make yourself dizzy while sitting down.

[Just]

Ok, struggling, I write notes to myself. I hate you. " That's it just I hate you". Have been for years. I would do it at night. When I would wake. Leave it on the kitchen bench or desk. Then go back to bed. 

For a long time I would think who were the notes for .... Not really sure for years. Now I can almost certainly say the majority were for me .@ @hluppy @ Lately..

[Ru-bee]

Hi @Just How did it feel being able to look back and realise that the majority of these notes had been for yourself? 

Is this something that you still do?

Our words can hold such power, I can't imagine it would have been nice to read these notes every morning