Battles

[Dreamy]

@NightFury awww sweet, I'm sorry to hear but I'm glad you are curled up in bed with a book. 

Today has been so crappy, I was hoping to start the new medication tonight. I went to the chemist and picked it up, told them I wanted the original brand not the cheap one and she acknowledged me and wrote it down. When I got home I realised that she'd given me the wrong ones so now I can't start it and have to try to sort it out tomorrow cos they were already closed by the time I realised. It really feels like another setback and it's rather frustrating. 

[NightFury]

Sorry to hear @Dreamy that's tough, especially when you were mentally preparing to start your new medication and then discovered you couldn't. It would have felt like such a let down.

I started the day full of anxiety and it got worse throughout the morning teaching block. I got all...discombobulated at work. Last week everything was deep cleaned and reorganised for next year, and I couldn't find what I needed to be able to teach my lesson. It was a mixture of things - I was already dysregulated and struggling to mask it, they'd moved my stuff around which my brain doesn't cope with, and I felt like I was already being pushed out ready for next year. I had some time off class, which gave me some space to myself and that helped...but the dysregulated, anxious feeling came back.

[Dreamy]

@NightFury yes it's hard cos it really does take so much strength to even be willing to give another medication a try. 

Oh that's so hard when things get moved around and I completely understand the not being able to cope with it. I get so frustrated and worked up when I can't find something. That feeling of being pushed away would be really heavy sweet and I'm sorry it felt like that. I'm glad that you got a bit of time off class and that it helped, it sounds frustrating that those dystregulated and anxious feelings came back. 

I really hope tomorrow is a better day for you sweet ❤️

[NightFury]

I hear you @Dreamy and I think I can understand. It's why I'm so anxious about my GP appointment tomorrow. My Psychologist was writing to my GP to recommend medication for OCD...I'm really really unsure of changing my medication, or of going on another. So, I can relate. 

[AuntGlow]

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@Dreamy wrote:

@AuntGlow it was good to get things done but I'm feeling sore and tired after it. 

It was a very emotional phone call and it was hard to talk about things. I felt like things just came rushing out once I started but I've been keeping everything bottled up cos I was scared to open up. 

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I understand being afraid to talk about things, so you should be so proud of yourself for meeting yourself in your emotions. How is this all sitting with you now? @Dreamy 💛

[Dreamy]

@NightFury yes. It's so hard especially when you find something that helps or you feel comfortable with and then there's talk of changing it or adding something else. It's scary and very anxiety provoking. Hugs my sweet, i hope the appointment goes ok and don't be afraid to speak up about how you feel about things. 

[NightFury]

Thank you for the reminder @Dreamy 

[Dreamy]

@AuntGlow I've sort of processed it a bit. But feeling frustrated at myself for not being able to hold myself together in that moment. I don't like being vulnerable, it's a scary feeling and letting anyone in to help means dropping down my guard and that is something that doesn't sit well with me. 

[Dreamy]

Hello @rav3n, how are you going? 

[Dreamy]

Hello @NightFury my sweet, how are for feeling?