Thank you for noticing and caring. @AuntGlow
I can only do what I can do. I can’t make people respect or include me, or my son. I have to respect his boundaries and decisions.
Yes, I keep my musical life unfolding.
The really bizarre synchronicity is that 2 people in the quintet today, will be playing at a performance with a group where the mother of my grandson often is involved. I was asked to attend but feeling the wisest thing at the moment is to stay away. I don’t want to cause a scene or overstep. So the social creative environment actually does respect me but the family of my grandson are playing status bureaucratic destructive games. It’s small world stuff. I just have to cope with the rejection and keep finding the glimmers.
After we finished playing today the fellow who runs it, thanked me and said I was in the right place. He knew I was vulnerable and isolated from a few years ago. He also has very high standards. Maybe my merit and perseverance will prevail, somehow? Idk. Weary smile. I am self regulating.
Most of the players are unaware of the connections.
My son’s father is of the same class as the maternal grandfather. They are very upper middle class. Richer people play mental health issues differently than what went down in my family of origin. I gave plenty of informed empathy. Serious mental health issues are on all sides. Not my diagnoses, just the realities. My son was surprised his father is even interested in contacting the grandson.
I laboured for 16 years caring for a Protective services case. Hmmm. So I have seen the stories from many angles. it gave me my neck condition from my mid 20s. Overwork, not a dole bludger.
The father rammed so much politics down my son’s throat, that my son went the opposite way. I was on the same side as the father but still he rejected me.
The father excels at red herrings and changing the subject. It’s more passive aggressive and shifty. Endlessly praising Martin Luther King and American Democrats and not talking to the young man who is kin. My son’s father prioritised his first born daughter of another woman, ( protective services case, not because of me, but the nurses wouldn’t let that mother home from the hospital at birth, and I was assessed as suitable.) Anyway the father overcompensated and let her bully, and owes his youngest child, his son, and my son, a few explanations, and some moral support.
