Henry's Landing Strip & Hangar

[Appleblossom]

Thank you @Anastasia 

Dear @HenryX 

Your explanatory posts offer so much wisdom.  

Dealing with grief is a complex experience.  From dealing with deep pain and sense of loss and longing to lighter feelings and remembering good times.  My grief story is heavy and can be triggering. It has taken quite a few retellings to lighten the load at all and be able to walk forward without feeling I have dishonoured, or disowned the experience, or been dissociated.  We each have our unique grief path .... I can respect it is not easy for anyone.

Choosing to share about something with pleasant, learning and fun associations has been a way many of us do to develop stronger sense of memories and experiences and anticipation of beter times to come.  I tried to do that in my way when I first came on the forum, even if it is my random sharing of news articles which trigger different responses in different people.  By the time I joined the forum I had enough space between me and those experiences so that moving forward was important.

Sadly the lack of adequate therapuetic environments, and my lack of ability to prevent the past from spilling into my children's life has meant we are in another crisis atm.  It may be a crisis that lasts a long time.  Thanks for including and tagging me.

Mostly atm I see the local birds like maggies soar here and there.

Igor Pose

[Anastasia]

@Appleblossom 👂😔🙏💞

[HenryX]

Hello @Appleblossom and @Anastasia , @Former-Member , @Emelia8 , @Shaz51 

and other visitors to this thread

@Appleblossom I appreciate and receive as encouraging, the sentiments that you have offered in your responses, as I do also, those offered by other members in the thread and on the forum.

We are, I believe, in agreement about the process of traveling the path while experiencing grief through all types of loss. But particularly with regard,

"to walk(ing) forward without feeling (that) I have dishonoured, or disowned the experience, or been dissociated.

Remaining at peace with ourselves, while honouring the memories of those with whom we can no longer engage in personal interaction.

One of my biggest concerns in life has been to protect my children, even if by my own absence, from some of the aspects of grief, as well as other issues, that I have experienced and with which I have endeavoured to cope in my life. As a result, I am now trying, without undue anxiety, to re-establish some of the connections, particularly with my children. I feel more free, now, to walk this path.

I also acknowledge the absence of appropriate therapeutic support at various stages, either because those support elements were non-existent, were in the process of development or simply overlooked in previous therapy in which I had been engaged.

One awareness, that I have, is that it is never too late to take a new, more updated and informed approach to any of the issues in my life. I welcome the opportunities to apply newer principles, of which I become aware, in and to my life.

With My Best Wishes to You and Other Visitors

@HenryX 

[Clawde]

😇 a beautiful Sole you are my @Appleblossom 😇

[Former-Member]

Thanks for your messages @HenryX 

I am sorry that I can't reply just now. 
Bit really appreciate your messages. 😊

[Former-Member]

Feeling a little more relaxed. I live near a very small airport. I constantly hear the small planes fly by. The funny thing is, at approximately 2am I hear helicopters. Not sure why they are flying about at that time of the night. I'm a light sleeper. @HenryX 

[Former-Member]

Do you want to talk about anything @Emelia8 

[Former-Member]

It's ok to talk about happy things, sad things. Whatever you like @Emelia8 

[Former-Member]

How is your day going @Anastasia @HenryX @Clawde @

[Emelia8]

Thanks @Former-Member  I appreciate that.  But there isnt really much to say.  At present all I can think of is this:

My last memory of my husband is when he was cold and deathly pale in the hospital, after they let me back in to see him after they failed to revive him again.  Cold, pale and his chest was red and covered in wounds from their long battle to resuscitate him for the third time.  And prior to that are the memories as he lay on my Dads loungeroom floor where I had managed to drag him from the couch in my own attempts to apply CPR, while waiting for the ambulance.  Then the ambos arriving and all the equipment laying around him as I handed over his care to them.  I dont have many happy memories right now.  I know I need to shift focus somehow, but its really hard.  I have so many intrusive memories haunting me.