Intro - Carer to 25 year old with mental health issues

[Tubey]

I am new here and eager to meet others located in Perth facing similar issues.

My 25 year old daughter recently had what they would have called in the olden days a 'mental breakdown' after a relationship breakup. On top of this, she has a mild intellectual disability so can be difficult to reason with. She is now living back home with us - her parents - and I am finding the transition from empty-nester back to a full-time carer tough.

I am also finding ' the system' offers very limited help and I cannot really see that there is a path for her recovery ahead and things do not seem to be improving. 

[tyme]

Hi there @Tubey , 

Welcome to the forums and sharing what's been going on for you.

That sounds like a life changing event where you've found yourself having to be a full time carer.

Has she been in hospital? Is so, were there any outpatient/community supports put in place for her?

I hear how stressful this is for you all. Also, is she linked in with NDIS?

[Tubey]

Yes she has been to hospital and we had hospital in the home for a couple of weeks too. The community mental health service does not seem to provide much support other than check her meds and make sure she is not suicidal - something they continually ask, even though she has never indicated that she is.

Hospital was in April. Since then we have undertaken cognitive testing which has formed the basis for us successfully applying for and being granted a Disability pension. Our NDIS application is still being processed. We don't have any other family support or services helping.

[tyme]

Hi @Tubey , so it sounds like things are getting put in place, but it's just taking time. Do they have an approximate time?

[Tubey]

No time frame. We applied a few weeks ago and were told it could take several months for a NDIS plan.

[Oaktree]

@Tubey 

There are several mental health support organisations here in Perth depending on where you live. A couple that I know of that you could look into are Tendercare (they take people on or off NDIS) and another newer one is Arclight Group. They have support workers and recovery workers and they take clients out. The idea is to get them out of the house and back doing things in the community. I am a client of one of these and I do things like go to walking groups, go to the movies, go to art group and to bbq's put on by the organisation. Most of these things are free or have a small cost. I do have a card which makes movies cheaper.

[Sugarshack]

Are you able to make a plan that transitions her to independent living? It's not ideal for either party if you don't love her and want to care or help her get back on her feet. If you aren't willing or able to foster support, resentment will build and the situation will become hostile so it seems to me it might be helpful for you to consider how long will you tolerate the situation, how much money you will give towards remediation or, be honest to all parties involved and send your daughter out to the world to fend for herself with her own resources. Dont help her, leave her to fate and chance, thats what my mother did to me and I hate her for it but, she set me free from a lifetime of being a burden to her and I was able to reconcile a very diffcult upbringing alone.